Dressin' Up

The boys are big into getting geared up as...whatever. Batman, Superman, Squints, Uncle G, whatever. Jake finally found my old cub scout uniform and he's decided it's his lightweight winter jacket. Brady goes for the 20 year old leather/fleece vest. Hey man, whatever gets them out the door.

Aloha

Mommy went to Hawaii with Aunt Julie last week. It was free trip provided by the hard work of Uncle Jarrod. He won employee of the year and this was his prize. Why he didn't go I will never know. Maybe he has an extreme fear of large bodies of water called "Oceans" and avoids flying over, swimming in, or even thinking about them. Oh wait that's me. Whatever the reason, good looking out bro.

Not that I wanted Mommy to go, but she needed a vacation. I have traveled all over the continent the last few months while she had the dudes all alone so now was my chance. To tell the truth, I was freaked out. Not that I can't handle being with the boys 24/7. That's not it. The problem is that for the past 4 years, I have given the boys exactly 3 baths. Seriously. I SUCK at bathtime and Jake is the first one to tell me. Loudly and with much passion. I don't do it just like Mommy does it and gosh darn it, that's not good enough.

So the tension was there. In warmer weather I could have just soaped them up and let them play in the sprinklers. If only. But no...it's too cold and I'm slightly too classy for such a move. When 8PM came that little timer in my head clicked. Oh $%#*, time for a bath. I ran some water while the boys got naked. Checked the temperature on the rubber ducky thermometer. Said a little prayer. Allright, here we go. That's when it happened. They smiled. They laughed. They had fun. No complaining. No fighting. Just...a bath. The whole week I gave them baths and we all had fun. I even got Jake to admit to Mommy that he likes my baths. Not as much as her's of course, but enough to let me do it again. Brady, well heck..he'd do anything to get in water so I don't think he gives a squirt who bathes him.

Hooray for me!

Thanksgiving

So, um. Yeah. It's December and I am just now getting around to the Thanksgiving post. Hmm.

Ok. So we ate "poultry" for lunch at Grandma Mimi and Grandpa O's house. That's an inside joke I will never let my Father live down. It was good and the boys had a blast. The boys always have a good time over there. I think because the house is filled with super nice furniture and knick-knackery all of which they don't get yelled at for touching and/or breaking. Our house is filled with IKEA furniture and toys they get to play with all the time...and unfortunately we have to discipline them when they break stuff. Such is the burden and hope of parents, that we will be grandparents some day and the word "NO" disappears from our vocabulary.

What was I talking about?

Oh yeah. So then we went to Ma and Poppy's house. Always a good crowd and good food. I gotta give big ups to Ma this year on the turkey. A fine, fine bird. The boys ate their weight in turkey and pie and played with all their cousins until they dropped. Turkey makes me sleepy. Eating turkey for 6 hours make me super sleepy. Mmmm...turkey burps.

We had a lot to be thankful for this year. I would love to list them all but that's a ridiculous amount of work and I am fully aware of my laziness. So, if you think I should be thankful for you, your family, your health, your favorite sports team's success, that good looking male/female who checked you out at the gas station and made you feel hot again...whatever it is...yes. I am thankful for you and all your peeps.

Most of all though, I am thankful for my family. We are healthy and we are together. What more do I need? Well, maybe a PS3 but thats it. Nah just kiddin...or am I?

Gross

While I'm shotgunning posts here, I gotta get this one down. One of my main reasons for doing this blog is to help me remember all the wild and crazy things the boys do so I can embarrass them later on. I got a honey of a story for you.

I was downstairs today working on the computer. Jake went upstairs to drop the kids off at the pool. After about ten minutes I hear both the boys laughing and giggling. I said," Jake are you done dude?" More laughing. Then, "Ewwww, do it again." Uncontrolled laughter. "Ewwww." I bolted upstairs. Jake is bent over and Brady is wiping his butt for him. I swallowed hard and tried to be firm. What do you say to that?

"Ewww. Don't ever do that again."

You guys are gross and I love you for it.

Halloween 2006

Scared? If you're a bad guy, you should be.

Halloween was fun. It was the day after got back from Louisiana, but we caught a sugar high and drove on. Uncle Jarrod, Aunt Julie, Makayla, and Ma and Poppy came over to join in the lunacy. The dudes put on those costumes and become Superman. Needless to say you don't give Superman just any candy..you give him ALL the candy. They had full buckets in no time. Ahh..try and put a three and four year old to bed after a half pound of sugar. Superman, where were you?

Louisiana

Allright, allright. It's taken me longer than it should have to write about it. However, it took me longer than it should have to make the trip happen so, you know...can't mess with continuity.

Allright. Frontier Airlines. I wish bankruptcy on them. Maybe that's too much. At least a hearty case of "the runs" though. That'd do it. I won't get into it because that's just too long and painfull of a story.

National Car Rental. You guys saved the day. An '07 Escalade with a flip down screen and DVD in the back for the dudes...all for $60 a day. Nice. Nice. See, when a major corporation screws something up, it IS possible to fix it.

Anywho, we had a great time once we actually arrived in Shreveport. The boys finally got to meet Granny and Grandpa. Grandpa is my man. Coolest guy I know. It made my heart full to see him with the boys. Granny is Grandpa's equal, except in the kitchen..she's better. The boys got to have some of her beans and ham for lunch. Mmmmm. I've never left their house with an empty stomach and now, neither have the boys.

After hugs and kisses they took off and played like I did when I was a kid. It was really strange to watch Jake play on the same stuff I used to. Since he is my clone it was like watching myself. Man, I'm good looking. Brady was real big into picking up pecans. Yes, he is allergic to nuts. Yes, we let him pick up the pecans...but with the shell on it. Turns out that hard shell didn't help..he broke out with a rash anyway. Lesson learned. DOH!

The boys got to see Aunt Doreen again and meet their Uncle Bruce. It's funny, most of the time when they meet someone new they can be a little aprehensive. Not on this trip. The boys went right up and hugged everybody. Brady even gave Uncle Bruce some extra hugs.

My Grandpa has a talking parrot. Chico. That's one crazy bird. Little boys love talking animals. Talking animals apparently love little boys. They just couldn't get enough of eachother.

Cindy and the boys also got to meet "Miss Karen" for the first time. After years of talking and video chatting she finally got to hug them. She's a real cool lady and the boys took right to her. Jake fell in love with her pumpkin pie. Brady couldn't get enough of her toy room. Having Uncle G there didn't hurt either. Full heart and a full belly once again.

I showed them Cross Lake. We ate Southern Maid doughnuts. Pondered the Red River and why it's not really red. Stayed up late, slept late. Ordered room service. All that jazz.

It was just too short of a time to do everything we wanted and see everyone we wanted. Oh but we'll be back. Yes we will.

Pitter patter

We have laminate wood flooring upstairs. We don't have rugs yet. YET. Anytime anyone walks around upstairs, you hear it. Heck, you almost feel it. Especially when the Jake and Brady show is in progress.

Thump-thump-thump...pat-pat-pat...slap-slap-slap...HAHAHAHA..thump-thump-thump...pat-pat-pat...slap-slap-slap...HAHAHAHA.

The novelty is wearing off. Quickly.

Happy Birthday Brady!

I can't believe you're 3 already little dude. Crazy. It seems like yesterday we just went and picked you up from the NICU to take your jaundice little booty home. You had to be the star from day one. Now look at you, the little poser on the stairs up there....what a goof.

Your party was awesome. You got to show off your new digs to everybody. You wanted a Curious George birthday so...you got it. Me and Mommy stayed up till 2:30 making your cake. Grandma Mimi made you a pinata. Plus you had the monkey bounce house in the backyard...pretty sweet deal. You played like a madman the whole time and made everybody laugh. You're one of a kind dude.

Happy birthday son.

Done

We are finally officially moved in. Well, moved in to the garage at least. Now we can spend the next month going through junk we never even knew we had. Oh joy. We used to have a really big garage out there, dadgummit.

The boys have been really good with the whole moving experience. I am way past crazy at this point, but they are just rolling with it. They finally got all their backyard toys today and even got to take quick dip in the ol' inflat-o-pool. Too bad the weather decided to turn cooler so the water was freezing, but they had fun anyway.

Ahhh, cooler weather. We can actually use our Zoo membership again. Brady is itching to go. Every night he wants a story about the zoo. He wants to see his animal buddies again. The snakes, Gila monster, pirranah, eels, python, and roaches. Yep, roaches. Oh and the "monkeys with the red booty's". Otherwise known as baboons. Can't forget about the goats that make "little black poopies". Jake is excited to go to but he's holding out for ZooLights. That's when the put up all kinds of Christmas lights around the zoo and have a bunch of cool displays set up. Even a lifesize talking Giraffe. Pretty dang cool.

It will be good to get back into our normal routine again. Buying a house is cool, moving is not. Now we get to relax again, and just enjoy the dudes. Well, relax up until Brady's party next weekend, but after that yeah...relax. Oh wait, Uncle G's coming to town and then we leave for Louisiana. OK, so relax after that. Uhh, we get back the day before Halloween.

I'll sleep when I'm dead.

All is well

The boys are sleeping soundly in their new rooms. Cindy is asleep on the couch. I am about to rouse her to join me in bed upstairs. I forgot how much moving into a house takes out of you. Especially when it has stairs. Ahh, I curse you stairs...but you're still cool.

We are about halfway done, and I am ready to quit. Visions of selling what's left at the old house for pennies on the dollar are running through my head. I mean, I like that stuff, but...I really don't need it that bad do I? We have our beds, the couches, the TV, the tables, ohh..wait, we need clothes I guess. And somewhere to put them. Hmmm. Dang.

Oh, and a word to wise. Do you have dog's? Cats? Furry shedding creatures of some sort? We don't, but the previous owner did. We thought it wise to buy a Dyson-animal vacuum. Best money I ever spent. Turns out she left us the gift of over 20 canisters of dog fur and dander in the carpets. Now, she only lived here 2 years, and the carpet is only 2 years old. And, she had one medium-sized dog. The house was otherwise clean to the naked eye. Doing the math yet? Beg, borrow, or buy a Dyson. We had the carpets steam cleaned for the sake of our little allergic dudes, but Mr. Dyson has himself a wonderful product to be enjoyed by all.

Home Sweet Home...Finally

That's My Family walking in to Our House for the very first time. Today was a very good day.

It hasn't fully sunk in yet that we finally have our own house. That may take a while. The boys can bang stuff up and make it their own. They have what every little boy wants in a house; stairs. I think they must have run up and down a hundred times in two hours tonight. That's fine though. Those stairs belong to them now. Heck, the whole house is their domain anyway...who am I kidding?

I can't say how pleased as a man, as a husband, it makes me to be able to provide this for my family. I've never been in a position to do it before and it has always made me feel a little less than adequate. My wife has a home she can call her own. She can paint, decorate, go silly with fixtures, window treatments, whatever...it's hers. She has waited long enough and put up with more than her share. She deserves it.

My heart is full and my mind is at ease. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Cuddlin Up!

When the boys aren't plotting on eachother they're just the best of friends. Mornings are a good time to catch them in a state of brotherly love. I snapped the shot a few days ago when they first got up. The dudes wanted to cuddle up and watch a little Playhouse Disney before breakfast. That's quality stuff right there. It almost makes me forget about thirty minutes later when Jake was chasing Brady around the house, growling at him. Ahhh...selective memory.

Happy Birthday Jake!

I can't believe you're 4 dude. No way. Well, from the size of you, I would guess 6 or 7 but...anyway.

This year you wanted a Superman birthday and that's just what you got. Your Mom and I stayed up late the night before making your cake. Well, I actually just cut it out and told her where to put the frosting so she is mostly responsible. When you boys are older I am going to miss making these cakes for you. It's more fun for the both of us than you guys can imagine.

Your party was a blast. Your cousins came over and played in the big-bouncy-house thing. We ate a ton of pizza and wings. You got a ton of cool presents and even two Napoleon Dynamite birtday cards. Cracked you right up. You blew out the candle on your cake. Well, Brady blew it out the first time, so we had to re-light it so you could do it. He's a sneaky fella. Then you ate a HUGE piece of cake, cut right from the center...as you requested.

This was such a cool birthday my man. I hope you remember what a great time you had. I always will.

Welcome home G

He's back. He's in one piece...for the most part. I assume by now he's eaten a good meal, taken a long shower, enjoyed a fine American beverage, and slept in a clean soft American bed. He certainly earned it. Welcome home bro.

9-11-01

Five years ago I was in bed asleep. Your mom was getting ready for work. She turned on the television, not a normal part of her morning ritual. What she saw was anything but normal. Chaos was unfolding on live TV. A horrible, terrible, historic moment in our Nation's history, and I was sleeping. She came in and told me to wake up, that I had to see this. That's all she said. I sat up, turned on the TV in our bedroom and watched. She left to go to work and we didn't even say goodbye.

When the TV came on I just saw flames in a tall building. I wish I could've closed my eyes. Maybe a minute after I started watching, I called my friend Mark and told him to turn on his TV. We both watched as a plane flew into another building. We maybe said 5 or more words in the next hour. We couldn't stop watching and we couldn't hang up the phone. Our Country, our beautiful Country, was being attacked and there was nothing we could do, but watch.

In a few minutes, we would learn about two other planes and two other attacks. Still, no words could express our emotions. We didn't need to speak. Everyone knew what was happening, but we didn't want to admit it. Like maybe we were all just watching a movie that would end eventually. It just never ended.

On that day, heroes were made and lost by the thousands. Firefighters, policeman, soldiers, ordinary citizens. All heroes. I felt shame that I couldn't help. I drove down to the blood bank and was turned away...too many donors. When your mom got home, we just watched. I don't remember talking. I remember crying. I remember being angry. I wanted it all to just go away. I wanted vengeance.

Tonight, I am sitting footsteps away, from thousands of soldiers who stood up and volunteered to bring vengeance to the doorsteps of those who perpetrated these acts. Men and women, who have gone into the face of certain danger time and time again. Your Uncle G is one of those soldiers. He is on his way back home from Iraq. He has spent over two years of his life there.

In those two years I have celebrated your birthdays. Taken you to movies. Told you bedtime stories. Kissed you goodnight and told you I loved you. Everyday. It is my privilege. A privilege paid for by better men than me, who have given their tomorrow for my today. There are Fathers who will never get to see their children. Never know the joys of parenthood I know. I am eternally grateful.

Monsoon Sunset

No camera tricks, just good ol Ma Nature doing her thing. The boys just bust out laughing when they saw this. Not that it was so funny...but I think it just shocked them to see the sky so colorful. We see pretty sunsets like this all the time here. However, I need to take more time to see it reflected in Jake and Brady's eyes. Beautiful.

Steve Irwin

I first saw this guy probably back in 1996 or so. I was watching TV with my buddy and we flipped on to see this nutty Australian dude, playing with snakes and crocodiles. I was hooked. We would sit and watch him all night. The guy just loved animals.

Sadly, he passed away today and the world will miss him. He was a family man, and I feel terrible for his wife and kids. What a loss. Thankfully though, my boys will have his show to watch and be entertained and educated by for years to come. Say a prayer for him and his family.

Batman

Brady will wear his Batman mask for hours at a time if you let him. He loves it. He turns into a different little dude when he puts it on. A short, fast, masked avenger...that's our B.

"44"

I was given this book a while back by my buddy, GW's, Mom. She said it reminded her of me and my boys. I didn't know at that time what a huge compliment that was. After reading it, her words really touched me and I am forever grateful that she presented this book to me. I liked it so much, I wanted my Daddy to read it, and he did. He liked it as much as I did, maybe more. Quite possibly more, because as fate would have it, we are now in the process of getting this book turned into a movie.

Uhh..What?!?

Yeah, I said a movie. It's something I never thought I would be doing in my wildest dreams. I like movies. Watched my fair share. I've even had a desire to write a screenplay for a long time. But NEVER did I think I'd be sitting here talking about actually making a movie. Life has taken another turn for the surreal. But a really, really good turn...don't get me wrong.

Right now, I can't say too much about it because we're just getting started so...really there's not much to say. I'm talking to a few screenwriters, and a few other people who actually know how to get a movie made. Which helps. If that's what you're in to. Making movies and all. Which apparently I am.

If you want to read the book, by all means pick yourself up a copy at amazon. Or you can go here for more background and ordering information. Or...I might let you borrow it. The point is, read it. It'll do your heart good.

Funny

This video cracks the dudes up to no end. Yeah, it cracks me up too. Grown-ups are funny.

Give it up dude

On a typical day, the dudes will fight over a toy 2 or 3 times. Which often brings tears, anger, and frustrated screaming from them. We do a lot of time/toy management. That has shown to be the most effective way of dealing with these volatile situations. There is almost never a clearly defined "had it first" person. So, whomever has it at the present time, keeps it for 2 minutes and then has to give it up, nicely.

Now, "most effective" only works when we pay attention to them. Sadly once in a while we just don't give the precious little snowflakes 100% of our eyes and ears. Amazingly, there are more pressing matters to attend to than supervising a session of wholesale lunacy. When that happens, we often get what we had tonight;

The boys were playing picnic on the kitchen floor. Had the whole thing set up. Dishes out, food going, condiments...condimenting. Dessert. The works. After about 15 minutes, the food must've run out because they got fully bent at each other. Jake apparently had the pepper, Brady wanted it. Jake wasn't giving it up, so Brady snatched it. Jake swiped it back. Brady screamed, said, "SMACK", then hit Jake in the head and took off running for his room. Jake ran after him screaming that Brady was a bad boy and was trying to hit him back when we intervened. Oh, brother.

So.....yeah, they had to be separated for a while. Ten minutes of alone time in their rooms bought us the rest of the night with no fighting. What a wonder ten feet and two closed doors can do for a relationship.

Awesome

Way to go O.

Mr. Mockery and The Aquaholic

Jake's newest trick is mockery. Well, it's not that new I guess...but it's becoming a problem very quickly. I don't think he intentionally does it most of the time, but he does it nonetheless. Sometimes (read; always) he gets a laugh from Brady so he keeps going. Which is only slightly annoying unless we are in public.

Most of the time he'll just repeat what we say to him right back to us. Bad but not embarrassing. If we are out and he hears someone, especially a teenager say something weird or slightly funny, he immediately turns to Brady, busts up laughing and repeats what they said, or says,"The Guy!"

He's a character that one.

Oh and Brady is officially addicted to water. He cannot be trusted to contain himself around even the smallest amount of the stuff. Puddle on the ground? Both feet. Both hands. Parents not looking for one second? Sneak to the bathroom and pour water on his head. And on the counter, sink, toilet, floor, brother.

Maybe he will be an Olympic swimmer one day. Or, maybe he'll be a Crystal water dude. Who knows? He may even discover a cure for prune hands. One can only hope.

He's a soggy character, that one.

Awwww...

The Dudes. Eat it up.

Phew...

My brain is mushy. This past month has been so nutty I haven't had time to stop and take it all in. I wish I had a pause button I could hit. I'd hit it. Then I'd stop and reflect on each moment that has flown by.

I feel like I need to be taking more notice of everything. Especially the small things. I want to document every little moment I share with the boys. That's entirely ludicrous, but I still want to. I have a fear that I won't remember something that turns out to be important to one of them. I'm retarded like that.

I play the "what if" game way too much. My mind is prone to thoughts of extreme situations and circumstances. Tonight, I read where next year it will cost over 30K to send a kid to Harvard for one year. Sweet fancy Moses. Now, I don't expect the dudes to go to Harvard but again...What if? At this point, all things are possible, and that scares the living hell out of me. I thought I had things all laid out. That's what I get for making assumptions.

Boy's, it is my greatest wish that life be a little more simple for you when you grow up. I'm not saying I want everything laid out for you. Far from it. However, I would like it if you just had to concentrate on a few basic things;

1. Providing for your family.
2. Educating yourself to the world around you.
3. Helping people.
4. Having as much fun as possible.

That's it. That's all you gotta do. Heck that's all I have to do. I just manage to complicate things until they seem impossible. Don't do that. Take the road less traveled and enjoy the scenery. Don't get caught up in your pride because that is the most foolish thing you can do. Trust me, I've been there and got the t-shirt to prove it.

Most of all though boys, heed this advice; don't do everything I tell you to do and don't take all my advice. I expect you to make mistakes. Huge mistakes. Mistakes you don't want to tell me about. That's the only way you're ever really going to learn, and I'm cool with that. Well, not all the way but I can deal with it.

Oh, and never try and put together rational thoughts when you are sleep deprived. That's a big one.

The wise man

11:40PM - Lunch with Mommy in her classroom

11:55PM - March on down to pre-school with Daddy

12:00PM - Kiss Daddy. Say, " See you later". Freedom at last. My own man. No Daddy. No Mommy. No Brady. Woo HOO!

2:30PM - Daddy, Mommy, and Brady come to pick me up. Kisses, hugs, smiles.

3:00PM - Rack out for some much needed sleep. All this knowledge makes me tired.

That's at least how I think his head works. He's a stud. No tears. No whining. He loves it.

Brady and I caught up on some drawing and tickle time. This turned out to be a very, very good day after all.

Dadgummit

That wasn't so bad. Not at all. I kept moving. Tried to look busy. All in a vain attempt to keep my mind from understanding what it was seeing. Jake was fine. Of course he was. He always is.

I am not fine. Today was only a preview, an hour of meet and greet. Tomorrow he's there for two and a half hours. Without me. With some cool ladies and kids no doubt, but without me.

It's not the first time we've left him somewhere. That's not it. I guess parents can understand my insanity here. If not, I would imagine I truly have lost my marbles. I don't want to hold him back but I don't want to let him go just yet either. Such is responsibility. Responsibility is such crap.

Ugh...

Jake won't take a nap today. Probably because he's excited for his first day of preschool tomorrow. I can't take a nap today because I am dreading his first day of preschool. He's excited, even if he doesn't fully get it. But he will, we both will and I think I might fall right the hell apart when we do.

He is not this old yet right? He used to take naps on my belly. I could fly him in the air without a back brace. He'd used to jump on my belly and it would tickle. Now he breaks ribs. He used to roll everywhere before he could walk. Now, he flies and makes swooshing sounds.

Time is getting away from me at an alarming rate. Jake, if I happen to lose my composure tomorrow and run away screaming, crying, and cursing the universe...tough. It's hard watching you grow up. I love you and it's these little milestones that don't seem so little anymore. They are big giant mountains and I have neither the equipment or the training to be attempting such climbs.

Good luck little man. Good luck to us both.

The end is nigh...

The end of summer that is. Today the realization hit me that I haven't updated in quite some time. This summer has been our best on record and I have been busy enjoying it. All of it. So let me give you the hightlights of Summer '06.

Disneyland. It was all we thought it would be times a million.
-Awesomely-short flight over. Jake and Brady ate it up.
-Supercalifragilsticexpialidocious hotel. Location, location, location.
-The dudes had bunk beds. Fun for all. Nerve-racking dangerous fun.
-Way too much food. Somehow though we kept right on eating.
-Way too many things to do. Our legs were sore for a week.
-Rode the cool stuff mutliple times. P.S. the Buzz Light year ride... superb
-Breakfast/Dinner with the characters. Worth the outrageous price. Almost.
-Pictures pictures pictures. Memories fade. Digital pictures don't. Or do they? Hmm.

We haven't gone on anymore trips but in a few months that will change. Besides that, we have mostly been chillin to the max Jack. Eating out. Going to the mall. Watching movies. Swimming in the trusty inflato-pool. The usual stuff.

I don't want this to end but in 24 hours or so...it's done. Well, at least we made the most of it. Next year...Super Bowl or no, I'm going back to Disneyland.

So now a few pictures from our Summer of Summer's. Enjoy.

That's what I'm talkin about

You WILL read this.

Endless Summer

At times, the summer creeps by around here. Too hot. Too tired. Too bored. At other times it flies by way too quickly. However, the last ten days or so have been zoomin'.

A lucky turn of events has occurred and kind of thrown us into a whirlwind. No, we didn't win the Powerball or anything but...for now we can stop worrying so much, about so much. If you have walked in our shoes, or even own the same brand(ahem...Wal-Mart) you understand.

With any luck, we can spin this into college for the dudes. Savings for my Presidential campaign. Maybe an ice-cream cone here and there. Who knows? Maybe, dare I say it...a vacation?!? Yep I said it. Yep, we're going. Disneyland. Boo-YA!

Now let me put this into perspective folks. Cindy and I haven't been on vacation since our honeymoon. That was seven years, four cars, four jobs, three houses and two kids ago. Our time has finally come. Sweetness.

It will be Jake and Brady's first trip on an airplane. First trip to CA. First trip, anywhere for that matter. Brady's not too jazzed about getting on the big silver bird, but I think he'll do fine once we climb aboard. Jake is just completely taken with the whole idea. Start to finish he's all in. It's a real short flight so they'll get a little taste of what the flight back to Louisiana will be like.

Disneyland is going to be more than I can handle. I've been only one time, one day and it wasn't long enough. I loved it. One of my top 20 experiences easily. My boys, I'm sorry if I embarrass you during the trip, but fair warning...it will happen. I am a giant four-year old. Ask your Mom, she's wise to me.

We are flippin lucky.

Lucky.
Lucky.
Lucky.

Thanks to "O" who provided the luck, this summer just got a whole lot cooler. You're the man. Seriously. Thank you.

Right on

The men sporting the funky camo on both sides of G are good dudes.

Donate

A hero needs your help. Get checked.

Gratuitous Zoo Pictures

It was WAYY too hot to be at the zoo that day, but for about 5 minutes we had some fun on the tractor. The rest of the time, we just sweated. We finally came to the conclusion that June through August is just a seriously poor time to take the Dudes outdoors and expect to have fun. Oh well. At least it looks like we are having a good time. Sorry boys. Sometimes Mommy and Daddy forget how close Arizona is to the surface of the sun.

I'm a Pepper, He's a Pepper...

I likes me some Diet Dr. Pepper. Cindy thinks it borders on obesession. I think she's right. I want to bathe in the stuff.

Anyhoo...a few weeks back we got a killer deal on some Caffeine Free Diet DP and we stocked up. OK I stocked up. Two or three cases, but who's counting. We are now down to our last 18 cans or so. Scary stuff.

I've been consuming most of them with the exception of two or three by Jake and Brady. We don't give them caffeinated/sugary soft-drinks, so all they usually score is a Diet Rite. When I found the CFDDP...I had to let them share in the goodness.

Turns out they like it. Not like I do, which is a good thing. They call it "Regular Dr. Pepper" because they can't have the Diet Cherry Vanilla flavor, which we also stock. Not because I horde the stuff...it's the caffeine content, honestly.

Long story longer, Jake is funny. Tonight we put the boys in bed and I headed off to feed my addiction. I cracked a can open.

*PookCHik*

"Daddy, what was that noise?"

"Sorry buddy. I opened a can of Dr. Pepper."

"Regular?"

"Yeah buddy, Regular."

"OK, goodnight."

"Goodnight Jake."



That's my boy. Just stay away from my last precious cans dude.

Baker

I don't have the words, but someone else does. Rest easy Dee.

6 Things to NEVER do...

Ok boys, here are a few things you are NEVER allowed to do. And, if you do them, expect swift and severe punishment. There will be more of the "rules" to follow as I think of them.


1) NEVER...Hang out in front of the mall and smoke. Do not be THAT kid. I will end you. Smoking is bad enough and I will throttle you unmercifully for it. However, if you try and be cool and advertise to the world that you are somehow cooler for smoking in front of the mall...I will end you.

2) NEVER...Play the stare-down game with someone in another car, just because you are with your buddies and you think you are tough. You might be, but there are always tougher dudes out there looking for a reason to prove it. They may call your bluff and it might not be with just their fists.

3) NEVER...Fail to open a door for a female who is within 20 feet of you. Especially after making eye contact. This applies to people with small children and basically anyone who looks to be in need of common courtesy. A little nice goes a long way.

4) NEVER...Start a fight for no good reason. Walk away if you can. If you can't, then finish it the other way. Respectfully put the other person on the ground. Hard. Then offer them a hand up.

5) NEVER...Lie. Even if it rips your guts out, tell the truth. If you don't, and I catch you lying...I will rip your guts out.

6) NEVER...Forget that no matter what you do, or what anyone does to you...I will always love you.

I am Sabretooth

I am Sabretooth. Jake is Wolverine. Brady is The Beast. Mommy is Rogue. We are all nerds.

Our battles usually start with Wolverine and The Beast picking a fight with me. I am not a coward so I accept their challenge. Ferocious tickling ensues until Rogue comes in to absorb my powers with a slight touch and send me crashing to the floor. Being a mutant with super-fast healing ability, I quickly recover.

Then Wolverine and Beast take refuge high atop Mt. IKEA. I growl and snarl, daring them to come down. Eventually they come down and it's on like Donkey Kong. They get tossed onto the Beanbags of Doom. Then lifted high into the air into my patented double-leg reverse tickle. Finally back down to be pinned to the ground and tickled into submission.

Eventually I lose every battle, but I will win the War. Oh yes, I will win.

Land of 1000 Dances

Poor to very poor quality but still, it's cool. The boys dig on this song like you wouldn't believe. They have all the grunts, yells, and na-na-na's down. Kind of a "have to be there" thing, but thought I'd share it anyway.

Roping the wind

We had to seperate the squirrels today. We do this every once in a while just let them know that they are actually seperate people. Most of the time they spin around together like they are caught in a three-foot tornado. Stuff flies out of the vortex unexpectedly, things get broken, and the innocent are left crying and helpless in the wind.

For now, the little microbursts are napping soundly in their beds. No doubt dreaming of new and exciting ways to tear the house apart.

Fight the Power

Brady thinks he has control over all of God's creation. Well, he does until someone tells him otherwise. Yeah, he's two and that comes with the territory, but still. His newest revolt is going to sleep. Used to be you could put him in bed, two stories later he is sawing logs. The last week or so, he's been sitting up demanding things, crying, yelling at us, yelling at Jake, and just generally fighting "The Man".

Tonight, even Jake had to tell him to be quiet and to go to sleep. When the King of singing, talking, and playing Superman in bed, tells you to be quiet and go to sleep...you have a problem. Brady, son, I love you...but please. Enough already. Just GO TO SLEEP!

It's hot dude.

Today, I finally had to break down and admit that it is indeed too hot. I could feel the sweat evaporating off my skin, only to be replaced by more sweat. All day long I looked like one of those Gatorade commercials where the dudes are just dripping. Except my sweat isn't all sorts of pretty Day-Glo colors. No matter how much water I drank, my body kept telling me,"Dude we need more water in here." Drink. Sweat. Drink. Sweat. Sweat. Sweat. Hallucinate. Have circular conversation with myself. Drink. Sweat.

And then, somehow, I finally got home. The boys had just gone down for a nap, but Jake was still awake, talking in his bed. I go in his room;

"Hey buddy, it's time to go to sleep."

"Daddy can I have a hug and a kiss?"

"I'm real dirty, so how about just a kiss?"

"Sure, Daddy." (mmmmwah)

"I love you pal, get some good sleep."

"I love you too Daddy, I'm happy you're home."

"I'm super-happy to be home with you Jake."


That's what it's all about. I can take anything mother nature can dish out as long as I have that kinda action when I get home. Good stuff.

Happy Father's Day

Happy Day dudes. I got a belt & disc sander. I was the first person in the door when Toys R Us opened. My boys are running around in Superman shirts, and laughing. All this and it's only 12:45PM. Nice. Best. Father's Day. Ever.

OK...now, it's 10:15PM and the day is done. Time to clarify and recap a few things.

Belt and disc sander. No, I didn't get a waist belt AND a disc sander. It's a power tool that includes both a disc sander and belt sander in one tool. It's sweet and it's all mine. Uh..and no, you can't borrow it.

Toys R Us. What can I say? I am a 29 year old toddler. We spent over an hour in there, but I wanted to stay longer. From bikes to trains, to video games it's the biggest toy store there is. I don't wanna grow up, but even if I did, I'd wanna be a Toys R Us kid. It's true.

Superman. I have been a Superman nerd since I was a wee lad. I get chills when I hear the Superman theme. So, now that the boys have caught the fever, I am completely regressing into my 5-year-old self. June 28th cannot come fast enough.

So thats the clarification. Now on to the recap.

The boys took a nap. Bonus. I went to Home Depot. Double bonus. We went to see our respective families, and no insanity ensued. Triple Bonus.

This has been just a completely perfect day from start to finish. Thank you Cindy for setting this all up for me, and for the most important part...my boys. Without you letting me be the Father of these two, I would never have my belt and disc sander....I mean I would never get to know the outright joy of being a Daddy.

All better now

Earlier tonight I was rushed to the hospital. First they took x-rays to determine the extent of my injuries. The doctors concluded that I needed emergency exploratory surgery right away. I was whisked to the OR where the two finest surgeons in the world went to work on me.

Turns out I had eaten a toybox, a bicycle, a shirt, Shrek, an apple, an orange with the peel on it, a pair of pants, an eyeball and other assorted nonsense. I don't remember ingesting all of that, but I'm sure glad they got it all out of me. But that wasn't the end of it. I also needed a brain transplant. Luckily, there was one readily available and they had it swapped out in no time at all.

They stitched up my head and stomach and applied bandages and kisses liberally. Normally, this would have been extremely uncomfortable to be recieving kisses from your doctors but, I let it slide this time. I figure they saved my life, that's the least I can do.

I really gotta start watching what I eat.

Books

Do you like books? I do. I like books on History, War, Politics, Nature, Wilderness Survival, and *ahem* Superheroes(comic books). However, what I read mostly are books dealing with deep social issues. Complex tales involving multiple characters, subplots, and emotions. Books that teach a lesson while at the same time being visually stimulating.

Yeah, I read a lot of children's books. Over and over. The thing is, the more I read them, the more I don't like "real" literature. I can invest maybe 5 minutes in a children's book and it's smiles all around and, "Read it again Daddy!" Or, I can read one of my most favorite history books for hours and all I get is a head full of useless knowledge and sleepy eyes. Do the math.

Before the boys, I would read a 300 page book in one night, maybe two if I was feeling lazy. Now, I read my books maybe once or twice a week. And thats when I'm needing an extra dose of drowsy.

When I'm an old man, and I have the time to read whatever I choose, whenever I choose what will I reach for? Chances are it will be something from the Seuss collection. If my eyes fail me, it won't matter because I know all of those stories by heart. I will sit and remember the times I read them to my boys, and the smiles we all shared.

Enough already.

I'm fed the heck up with driving around this city and seeing little kids ditty bopping around unrestrained in moving vehicles. No excuse. Absolutely none. You can go to any police station and some hospitals here and get a free car seat. FREE! So, it must be pure laziness. Unbelievable.

On the way home from the mall tonight we saw a disturbing example of this behavior. A newer Isuzu Rodeo with a little child jumping around in the backseat. That's bad enough, but once we got close to the vehicle, we could clearly see that the driver had her seatbelt securely fastened. OK. That says all I need to know about that person. She values her safety over the childs safety. Perfect. As if I didn't have enough wonderful feelings for the selectively retarded members of our society.

Buckle your kids up before my head explodes. Please.

June 6th 1944

Could you do it? Could you step off that landing craft? 62 years ago today, 1465 American men took their last steps off those boats. That's just in one day. On one long stretch of sand in France.

My sons, this is bravery.

This Memorial Day we went to the Memorial Cemetary to pay our respects. We'd never been there before and it was high time to pay a visit. We got the boys in their "My Uncle G is fighting for my future" shirts. They didn't know what to expect, and neither did we.

I didn't expect to see so many people. There was a steady stream of cars pouring in to the parking lot. The main drive was lined with large American flags. Volunteers placed hundreds of small flags above each headstone. Obviously, most of the people coming there, didn't know anyone buried there. People stopped to look, to pray, to take pictures.

We walked around quite a bit. We helped an old Veteran find a plot he was looking for. We showed the boys the plaques, the memorials and the graves. They don't really understand the signifigance, but someday they will. I will make sure they do.

"I'm sah-wee!"

Brady my man, you are the King of the pre-emptive apology. You have finally developed the fear of punishment. Actually in your case the fear of getting caught. Whenever you create some kind of mess, or explosion, or breakage...you say, "I'm sorry", even though we may or may not have witnessed your crime. It's cool, because it lets us know that it was indeed your fault, and that you know you did something wrong. Scratch that...you recognize that whatever you did WE will think is wrong. Either way it's both ridiculously cute and cool and it makes me proud of you. But heck, you don't have to do anything but breathe for me to be proud of you. Keep it up dude.

Easy Mac

What you have here is two little dudes enjoying a little Playhouse Disney on the computer. Uhh, but what is that white stuff they are eating? Marshmallow? No. Cheese? Not even close. Yogurt covered fruit of some kind? Heck no.

It's cauliflower. Oh yeah, cauliflower. Straight up, no dipping sauce required. They love it. We got some weird, weird dudes in this house. Healthy, but wierd dudes.

Guilty as charged

You know you've done it. Some of you do it everyday. Sometimes 2 or 3 times a day. Come on, it's ok..we all do it. Nothing to be ashamed of. Wait..what were you thinking of?!? Sicko.

I'm talking about spoiling the curtain climbers. It's fun. It's almost too much fun. So, here's my top ten list for ways to spoil the kids.

1) Ice Cream. For breakfast. No, I haven't done this, but...what if?
2) Staying up wayyy too late. I'm talking 11-ish. For no good reason.
3) French fries in the car. This happens far too often.
4) Scary stories. Only, not right before bed. I likes me sleep.
5) Trips around the block. That sometimes end up at Krispy Kreme. OK Always.
6) Not brushing their teeth. Some nights...it's just not happening.
7) Wrestling before bedtime. They won't calm down for an hour, but who cares?
8) Letting them eat with their hands. It's just funny.
9) Playing with toy guns. It's not PC. It's not "acceptable". Deal with it.
10) Letting them get as dirty and wet as they can, for as long as they want.


Good stuff. Indulge your kids folks...and you will be indulged.

Oops

Happy Mother's Day! Without the fairer sex, we'd never be here...so, thanks. C,K,P,K,R,E,T,J,H,A,...umm..some more letters...thanks to all the mothers who's names begin those letters. If I forgot any of you, just leave a nasty comment on here and sign it with your first initial.

Happy Day.

Bored

This is how I feel tonight. Nothing to write. The boys are fine. A little sniffly, but fine.

Jake made the cut...

He's officially too old. He'll be going to pre-school next year at Mommy's school. Only for a few hours, but still. He took a few tests today, passed with flying colors, and now...God help us all.

Inhale. Exhale. Repeat as necessary.

On parenthood

I'm a man and I'm not afraid to admit I love my children to whoever will listen. I tell my customers. I tell strangers in line at the bank. Whoever will listen. In turn, they tell me about their kids. In so many words we are telling each other how much we love being parents. How much we love our children. And deep inside, buried underneath the pride, is the pain only parents know.

The pain of missing out. The pain of regret for not somehow being...better. That burning in your gut, that tells you to do MORE. The knowledge that we only have them for so long. It's as though a wicked task master has presented you with an unachievable goal, that you may never know if you have even come close to achieving.

You don't know this going in. Nobody really knows it. Because you can't, until you get there. You cannot explain the emotions that take over when you become a parent. They just happen.

When the boys were first born, my mind exploded with joy, guilt, gratitude, worry, wonder, awe, and more guilt. That was just in the first 15 seconds. It hasn't changed in almost 4 years. I still worry nonstop about them. I worry about their present as much as their future. How can I make it easier for them? Should I make it easier for them? If I do too much, is it too much for me and too little for them...or vice versa? Wow, I just blew my own mind.

This is all sounding too depressing. Is it bad being a parent? Heck no. Is it the hardest thing I've ever done? Heck YES. Loving them is easy. I wake up loving them, and I go to sleep loving them. That's easy. Raising them is hard. Making sure they don't grow up and have their faces on a Most Wanted poster...is hard. Providing a safe environment for them is easy. Keeping them from proving me wrong about that is hard.

Boys, if I fail you in any way...blame Al Qaeda. No, no. Blame me. I am doing all I can. But, if I do fail you in any way, don't fail your kids in the same way. Learn from my mistakes. You are here on this Earth to make a difference. A positive difference. If you fail to learn from your mistakes and the mistakes of others, you will fail at changing your World for the better.

HOWEVER, if I am the perfect example of what a Father should be, well by all means; erect statues, name ballfields, throw parades, etc., all in my honor. Oh and have some kids and show 'em all the cool things your Daddy taught you. Like living room baseball. Yeah, stuff like that.

I love you boys.

Click it

This is for those of you who never bother clicking my linkery. Yes it's mostly military related. Click it anyway, and learn something besides what the voices in your head teach you.

Support for GW ...This is my buddy's Mom, laying her thoughts out for all to see on War, Family, Life, and the how each effects the other.

Mudville Gazette ...This a clearing house for all blogs related to our Armed Forces. Run by a soldier and his wife, it doesn't get any better.

Special Operations Warrior Foundation ...This foundation provides college scholarships to the children of our special operations warriors who are killed in combat. Give till it hurts. Then give $50 more.

Pat Tillman Foundation ...This is a great group of people honoring a great man. Throw them some cash.

Fast Bunnies ...Don't let the name throw you. This is an Army officer blogging from Iraq. If you served, you'll find his humor unbearably funny. If you didn't you'll find his humor unbearably funny. Win win.

From My Position...On the Way! ...Chuck is a former tank commander. Former, only by way of IED. He got knocked out of the game for a while but came back with a vengeance. Read it or he will find you.

Holly Aho ...Gotta be, hands down, one of the coolest people on earth. She visits, provides for, and looks after wounded soldiers coming right off the front lines. Is she paid for it? Not a dime. She's a civilian. She's an angel.

Jack Army ...The Man. If it's available in the Army, he's done it. In a few months he'll be plying his trade again, in the sandbox. Read up.

Soldier's Angels ...Like Holly, these are all angels walking the earth. Throw them lots and lots of cashola.

The War Tapes ...Filmed by soldiers in Iraq. If this hits in theaters near you, help make these guys billionaires.

Texas Music ...Another odd title. If you ever wondered what goes through a police officers head when he's on the street....click and read.

CLICK AND READ.

and miles to go before I sleep...

Our boys are good sleepers. Always have been. It's in their blood. However, they have both reached the age when delaying the process is as enjoyable as the act itself.

OK, that was too weird...as I just ended that last sentence I looked up and saw two little eyes staring at me from the hallway. Told you so.

Jake needs to pee. Brady needs a hug. Jake wants some water. Brady sees a questionable shadow. They both want Mommy. Nobody wants Daddy. Daddy gets comfortable. Everybody wants Daddy. It's our little ritual these days. The dance of the tired monkeys.

Rock and/or Roll

This is a Jake and Brady original. Long live metal.

From the backseat...

Driving a vehicle is 75% of my job. The other 25% is easy. I used to enjoy driving. But, now..logging 36K a year in the truck has taken away the pleasure and left mind-numbing tedium. Except when the boys tag along...

I will occasionally pick them up from Mimi's in the rig. Other times it's scooting around town in the Jetta. Whichever vehicle we are in, the ride is never a dull one. If it's just me and them, I'm most often persuaded into story time. They'll make up some wild premise and I have to expand on the concept as I drive. "Shrek and Fiona want to go eat crabby patties with Spongebob and the Lollipop Guild, and then they go to Willy Wonkas chocolate factory." Fun stuff. If it's an all-play, then Mommy gets to play DJ and work the CD player non-stop. She can spin tunes like nobody's business.

The boys are at the point now where they both know our usual driving routes and will point out landmarks along the way. "There's the Geico lizard", "There's the Barry Goldwater Memorial", "There's Pizza Planet"(what they call Peter Piper Pizza). If we ever get turned around, chances are good they can point us in the right direction. That's only for Mommy though...I never get lost. Nope not me..never. Honest. Hmmm...

The Ol' Ballgame

Jake went to a Diamondbacks game last night with his "Poppy". Instead of writing some fancy recap, I'll let Poppy's words stand.

"Thought you might like to take a look at some of the highlights of last night’s game. I really had a great time and I think Jake did too. He was perfect. He never asked to leave, never seemed to be overly bored and was nice to the people around us. As you would have guessed, he got lots of cool looks from the fans as we walked through the concourse and up and down the aisles to our seats. He’s the coolest; he just goes with the flow and acts like he does this all the time."

Tadpoles in Motion

This is a big file, and grainy as all get out. It's my first time..it'll get better. Enjoy.

The Depot

Today, we hit the Depot. Home Depot. The dudes have already acquired the addiction. Is it the smell of building materials, paint, fertilizer, and new appliances that does it? Or is it the sweet Tony Stewart shopping carts with the steering wheels and belt buckles? I don't know. But, its a dang good bet that if you ask the boys where they want to go, just with Daddy....its the Depot.

I can remember when I was kid, always wanting to go to True Value with the old man. It wasn't a big place, but they sure did have some cool stuff. I'll never forget when I got the 6-in-1 hammer-screwdriver-combo...thing. That has got to be one of the best inventions ever. Need a small head hammer? Got it. Need a screwdriver? Phillips or flat? Got it. Just let me unscrew it out of the handle my good man. If you never had one, get one. They aren't top notch tools, but sure is handy in the ol' junk drawer.

Times have changed a little bit though. Maybe the boys will look back to their first laser leveler. And how their Daddy kept stealing it all the time. Ahhh...good times. Good times.