Earlier tonight I was rushed to the hospital. First they took x-rays to determine the extent of my injuries. The doctors concluded that I needed emergency exploratory surgery right away. I was whisked to the OR where the two finest surgeons in the world went to work on me.
Turns out I had eaten a toybox, a bicycle, a shirt, Shrek, an apple, an orange with the peel on it, a pair of pants, an eyeball and other assorted nonsense. I don't remember ingesting all of that, but I'm sure glad they got it all out of me. But that wasn't the end of it. I also needed a brain transplant. Luckily, there was one readily available and they had it swapped out in no time at all.
They stitched up my head and stomach and applied bandages and kisses liberally. Normally, this would have been extremely uncomfortable to be recieving kisses from your doctors but, I let it slide this time. I figure they saved my life, that's the least I can do.
I really gotta start watching what I eat.
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And the angel answered and said unto the women, Fear not ye: for I know that ye seek Jesus, which was crucified. He is not here: for he is risen, as he said. Come, see the place where the Lord lay. And go quickly, and tell his disciples that he is risen from the dead; and, behold, he goeth before you into Galilee; there shall ye see him: lo, I have told you.
Matthew 28:5-7 (KJV)
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